Here I am, sitting at a breakfast place by myself. Enjoying HOT coffee and a very cheery waiter. I took a mental health day. I’m off from work and little bear is at the sitters. This is something I haven’t done since he was born.
Although that’s not the best day…. I know. Right? Yesterday was the best day. That’s right folks, day lights savings and a parade. Somehow we were so lucky that little bear slept late, was happy, we decided to press our luck and go to the St. Patrick’s Day parade. After all it was going to be right in the middle of nap time. But because of the time change I wasn’t sure what time that would be. We met up with friends, and my son was an ANGEL. No fussing, no crying, not moving from his seat. He was so entertained by the bustling resturant and then when we went outside for the parade he loved every min of it. He wasn’t even afraid of the fire trucks. Also someone gave him a balloon which was his new best friend.
My friends little girl however, she was melt down city. My, “oh my daughter never acts up or does that” friend. The one who says her daughter is a model kid every day of her life. (Silent smirk of validation)
When we got home little bear wouldn’t sleep. He was so hyped from the trucks and mummers he couldn’t possibly sleep. He kept telling us all about the parade. Running over “biiig beep beeps!” While my husband and I were waiting for the other shoe to drop….. it didn’t. My love stayed bright and happy and shiny right up until bed time. Then at 7pm, on the dot he kissed my husband and I took him up to bed. Not a peep, no fussing, crying, or waking in the night. It was the BEST DAY. I don’t know what we did to deserve this but I am beyond greatful we got to spend a memorable day as a family. It’s one of the best days we have had as a family.
Now I will eat my pancakes….. hot and alone.
When you become a parent you can’t help but think back to your own childhood and think about things you want to do and things you don’t want to do like your parents. My mother did silly things with us when we were little, we had tea parties and built forts. She would let us get muddy and gross and sleep in the backyard in the summer. She also didn’t want us to grow up, would hold us back, wouldn’t let us get too far or tell us we weren’t ready/ good enough. It’s not that she wasn’t a good mom, she was just afraid. Afraid we would leave and be successful and not be around anymore. This is something that has stunted me in my adult life, shaped decisions I have made, and caused me to waste so many of my adult years. I WILL NOT REPEAT THIS BEHAVIOR.
I’m excited for my little bear. I want him to try, fail, and try again.I’ll prop him up and encourage him. I’ll tell him he can be anything and do anything. If he wants to be a doctor one min. and a snowboarder the next I’ll help guide him. I’ll call in any and all favors to get him to his goal. I’ll be his biggest advocate because children CAN DO anything. If he wants to be a garbage man I’ll support it. (hopefully he is a little more ambitious) But that is not up to me, it’s up to him. If you do something you love then you’ll never work a day in your life. Coming from someone who has worked EVERY … SINGLE… DAY…. I see the immense value in following your dreams. Do the things, move to California, backpack across the globe if that’s what moves you little bear. I may shed a tear but I’ll never hold you back. I believe (like most parents) that my child is meant for greatness, and greatness comes in all shapes and sizes.
I’m excited to watch him grow and learn, because people are individuals and guided into the people they are. This is one reason I’m glad I had a baby after my 20’s, 20 something me would feel the need to control. Now, understanding life a little more and being able to view situations with a little less reactive energy I can’t wait to see what he wants to be, how he wants to grow, and what he CAN achieve.